传#金正恩前女友#被枪决，网友吐槽我的前任是个极品 Rumor has it that Kim Jong-un's ex-girlfriend has been executed by a firing squad. Chinese Internet users quipped: My ex is a weirdo. [Note: @我的前任是个极品 (My Ex Is A Weirdo) has 2,111,654 followers at time of translation.]展开全文
The water in a swamped swimming pool = water + disinfectant powder + drool + pee + eye gunk + ear wax + a small amount of menstrual blood + dead skin + hair + dandruff + all kinds of bacteria + foot odor + pus from open wounds soaked in water + flying small insects + ...展开全文
天枰座寄语新主席：保持优雅，别变太肥。（欢迎接龙，凑足12星座一起翻译。。。）A Libran's message for the new president: Stay elegant. Don't gain too much weight. (Feel free to join me. I will translate everything once I get messages from all the 12 signs...)展开全文
街上看到一对情侣遛狗。。瞬间我就凌乱了。。Note: 。Saw a couple walking a dog on the street…I was disheveled instantly… [Note: 凌乱 (líng luàn) Literally “disheveled”, this term describe the state of a person when he or she is extremely shocked and speechless.]展开全文
据说，这就是意译和直译的区别。。。高端黑啊！It's said this is the difference between liberal translation and literal translation...high-end dark (humor)! [Note: 高端黑 (gāo duān hēi) Literally "high-end dark". In Chinese, 黑 (hēi) "black" also means "dark and offensive".]展开全文
最近，很多同学都换上了「弯」的卡通头像，对于这种敢于表达自己真实的性取向的行为，我们应该鼓励和支持。Recently, many fellow students have switched to "bent" cartoon profiles. For this brave behavior to express one's real sexual orientation. we should show encouragement and support.展开全文
所以说，阻碍中华人民大团结的两点因素就是【北方暖气】和【江浙沪包邮】是么？So, the two factors that hinder the unity of the Chinese people are "heaters for (people in) northern China" and "free shipping for (people in) Jiangsu, Zhejiang, and Shanghai"? Right?展开全文
今日最佳图片，没有之一！切糕恒久远，一块永流传。The best picture of the day! Period! Xinjiang Nut Cakes Are Forever. [Note: Check this out in case you want to know why: 🔗 网页链接 ]展开全文
回复@知行Stone: The downloading of porn movies by single people (usually guys) takes up network traffic, which could be avoided if those people have partners. Here's another joke: 一个好的女朋友能帮你电脑省200G硬盘。A good girlfriend saves 200G hard drive space for you.展开全文
本地恋费时间，异地恋费话费，没人恋的费流量。Dating someone in the town takes time, dating someone out of town increases phone bills, and not being loved by anyone wastes network traffic. [Note: The last clause is related to guys downloading porn movies (usually from Japan).]展开全文
本地恋费时间，异地恋费话费，没人恋的费流量。Dating someone in the town takes time, dating someone out of town increases phone bills, and not being loved by anyone wastes network traffic. [Note: The last clause is related to guys downloading porn movies (usually from Japan).]展开全文
